The View from Number 80

Best of the Worst? - About.com's Paranormal site has a section featuring what are claimed to be "The Best Ghost Photos Ever Taken". The page is prefaced by a paragraph or two saying much the same thing as 80 does here about double exposure, digital manipulation etc. but this is followed by a typical believer's declaration. "But these photos are generally thought to be untouched, genuine portraits of the unexplained." Ah yes, there is always a but, although no evidence is given why these images and not others are particularly convincing. The photos displayed are all from the late 19th and early 20th century and are much the same kind of thing that appeals to addled types such as the The International Survivalist Society. (see Holey Cell Survivalist). Blurry, indistinct double exposures are all that can be offered as the "Best", and will only confirm not the reality of an afterlife, but near infinite human capacity for credulity. One such photo is of "The Brown Lady", a misty, wraith-like figure ascending or descending a staircase, puzzlingly described as "arguably the most famous and well-regarded ghost photograph ever taken.". A completely unsubstantiated claim that this blur is the ghost of a former resident, who had been ill-treated by her cad of a husband, leads to a description of the actual taking of the picture in 1936. "All at once I detected an ethereal veiled form coming slowly down the stairs. Rather excitedly, I called out sharply: 'Quick, quick, there's something.' I pressed the trigger of the flashlight pistol." This is slightly unusual in that it is claimed the ghost was seen prior to the shutter release, although we only have the word of a single witness. The other person present saw nothing, for he had his head under a cloth attached to his camera. The picture is unconvincing and the eye witness account useless, uncorroborated as it is. Remember this is supposed to be an example of the "best" spirit phography has to offer! It is noted that the cad in the accompanying story was an "ancestor of Thomas Townsend Brown, an American physicist who experimented with anti-gravity and flying saucers in the 1930s, and whose name has been connected to The Philadelphia Experiment." But that is another whole can of paranormal worms.

...and the Winner Is - the other three photos displayed are no better and each is accompanied by a supporting ghostly anecdote, as though this gave the image some verisimilitude. There is even a poll asking which is the best of the four. The winner is the "Brown Lady", a singularly odd title for a black and white picture of a blur, and properly refers to the ghost story and not the image. The connection between the the two is never established. The subject of spirit photos formed the very first item in The Glance, 80's look at current news and events, in June 2002. This featured a fascinating (and unintentionally funny) collection from the American Museum of Photography, which happily is still available under the title Spirit Photography 1868 - 1935 covering the heyday of the seance and pictures of spirits, apports and ectoplasm. This last is a nasty exudate produced by mediums in those days, but now rarely seen. The old photos that feature this substance reveal it to look most often like fine muslin cloth, and less frequently but more repulsively, snot. Also still on display are the highly entertaining, surreal and openly faked photos by William H. "Dad" Martin, which are wonderful, and have not dated in the same way as their spirit brethren. Just take a look at this untitled picture from a county fair to appreciate Martin's skill - this was no point and click digital manipulation - and his great sense of the absurd.

Crystal Claptrap - this page is a mixture of old photos in black and white and modern ones in color (and links to more of the same). None of them is even moderately convincing - nor is the explanation offered for "orbs", a photographic defect hailed as paranormal. "The use of digital cameras tends to produce white orbs - some solid looking - other (sic) looking like water bubbles. These are electromagnetic energy fields. Most are not spirits. It is interesting that so many of these orbs are showing up in photos now - or are we just becoming more observant of our photos just as we are becoming more aware of the spirits who are around us - and learning how to communicate with them." No, but more sophisticated cameras are now available to the gullible know-nothings who can't wait to post their masterpieces on the web. The writer, apparently one Ellie Crystal, offers a picture of her own. The reliability of this individual's testimony may be judged from the the blurb detailing the circumstances surrounding the image. Her inept use of the paranormalist ploy of the leading question is frankly infantile. "This is an example of a photo that may seem like spirits had a hand in its creation - as I was doing automatic writing with the woman seated at the table in my home - summer 1989 - Ricoh Camera. The images must have accidentally superimposed over one another. I know what you're thinking...There are no accidents. Further - I did not take any pictures in my pyramid - on that roll of film. Yet we must view this as a superimposed image. Don't we?" The photo in question is an example of double exposure - nothing more and nothing less. For a great article on a recent spate of modern "Ghostly Photos" Joe Nickell, writing in Skeptical Inquirer covers things in his usual no-nonsense fashion.

Jill of All Trades - lousy photography is, by the way, only one of Crystal's formidable talents. On the home page she describes herself as "Psychic - therapist - Reiki Master - Teacher - Author" but nowhere can 80 see a reference to "Inept Photographer" - a puzzling omission. The list of subjects covered by her website reads like a paranormal compendium - Ancient and Lost Civilizations, Celestial Bodies and Entities, Conspiracies and Mystery Schools, Crystals, Extraterrestrials (these are obviously different from Celestial Entities) and Messages from Other Realms. Seemingly very much out of place among this woo-woo list is a link called Physical Sciences. Click through, and you will find Crystal's idea of the physical sciences as skewed as the rest of her output. A quick rundown reveals this category embraces Alchemy, (featuring the Emerald Tablets of Thoth) the Photon Belt, Cloud Scrying, Cloud Angels and even a piece on Carl Sagan - although the Sagan that Crystal describes seems a different person to the rational scientist, writer and broadcaster. "Sagan knew that we only live on a spec (sic) of dust floating in a sunbeam but he also knew that humans were a special part of the universe. We are the way the cosmos knows itself. His lifelong obsession was the idea that there could be life on other worlds in our solar system and beyond. It is sad that he never lived to see the discovery of life in space. He would have been our ambassador." 80 must have missed the "discovery of life in space", you'd have thought it would have made the early evening news at the very least. By the way the Photon Belt is "a band of intense photon light that is near Earth at this time." Photon light - is there any other kind? Ellie Crystal's site is definitely one to which 80 will return - the mixture of straightforward scientific information with pseudoscience silliness is striking. The suspicion is that a lot of the information has been cut and pasted from elsewhere, and then distorted and misinterpreted via the prism of New Age nuttiness. A final example is the section on Contrails. After a conventional and unobjectionable description of the phenomenon Crystal then throws in "Contrails are spread by fleets of jet aircraft in elaborate cross-hatched patterns are (sic) sparking speculation and making people sick across the United States." and "Cobwebbing stuff coming down from the zigzagging jets flying all day long, line after line, back-and-forth, like furrows in a farm field. Immune system symptoms include swollen hands and legs, night fever and shortness of breath." Of course no references are supplied for these statements, the only evidence offered being some quite good and clear pictures of contrails - which means we can be sure of one thing, they were certainly not taken by Crystal.

Miscellany - is composed this time of some of the good sites that 80 has blundered across in the last month or so. First up is Rob's Rambling Log. This is well worth a regular look - currently there is a link to a piece by writer, broadcaster and Python, Terry Jones on the US administration's bending of the definition of torture and an extract from an Isaac Asimov interview on the late Gipper and Bush snr. Rob's description of Fahrenheit 9/11 bears quoting "This is not an anti-military movie, this is not an anti-America movie, this is not a pro-Democrat movie -- this is an anti-arrogant-rich-assholes-screwing-over-everyone-else movie." Good stuff, including a sizable archive - recommended. Positive Atheism  (subtitled For Those Seeking to Initiate or Invigorate Their Awareness of Their Own Freedom from Superstition and Theistic Faith) is definitely a positive experience. For those who feel they are contending alone with attempts by government to promote religion, uptight puritan morality, discrimination on the grounds of no belief and much more, browse this site and its lively letters page. It will show you that there are plenty of articulate, intelligent folk around who are just as frustrated and angry at the way things are going as you are - recommended. Old Superstitions features a large collection of, um, old superstitions, all categorized for your perusal under headings such as Animals, Cards, Acting and the Stage, Wedding and New Year's. The full list is much longer and, at first sight, quite comprehensive until you realize a giant, black, gaping void. There is no category for Religion, surely the most harmful and divisive superstition humankind ever dreamed up. This means the site is interesting but fundamentally flawed - in 80's view. If the kids are complaining that they have nothing to do - or you have some spare time yourself for something fun and educational - why not create your own fake UFO photos? All you need to know, with examples, is here courtesy of Michael Shermer's Skeptic site. Even if you can't be bothered to have a go, do take a look at the pictures. Ever wanted to own the killer rabbit that featured in Monty Python and the Holy Grail? I thought so, don't worry, you are not alone. Grab your credit card and go here!

Gods Wanted - finally, here is a site that brings religion right to the fore. The Great God Contest tries to " bring a final resolution to all religious wars, controversy and hypocrisy.... The rules are simple. Any religious organization in the world is invited to enter their god. The various gods will be given three challenges to fulfill. These challenges have been chosen because they represent typical accomplishments of most of the present day gods, as well as historical ones. In light of the various literary records, these challenges should be very easy for any god to accomplish." The three challenges are 1. Virgin Impregnated, 2. Corpse Raised and 3. a choice of A. Sick Healed or B. Multitude Fed. Sounds like a cinch for any moderately competent deity. As well as detail on the contest and how to enter, there are many links worth following up, such as a Bible Study Guide that is not to be missed. Recommended.